|See how shocked she is at my horrible behavior.|
I was afraid to get attached to my baby because of my thyroid issues increasing my chances of a miscarriage. Then once the 12 week mark hit I felt better but the baby had no nickname so I had to wait to find out if the baby was a boy or a girl. Once we knew, my husband couldn't decide on a name, so I had to wait for that. Now I'm 27 weeks along and I just want it to END! I keep running, but I can't run at the speed or distance that I am used to so it doesn't give me the endorphins that I need to feel better. So now I feel horrible because I'm not enjoying this pregnancy and I just want it to be over.
I really wish I could talk to my girlfriends about this but the one who I usually go to is dealing with personal stuff, the other one is trying to get pregnant so I feel bad complaining about my pregnancy when she wants to be pregnant SO badly, and the rest are pregnant with their first and I don' want to scare them with my horrible mothering.
So I just sit around at home and cry and get angry at everyone and then cry more and feel horrible about it. Thanks for letting me rant. Only 90 days until my due date to go. God give me strength.