Saturday, September 3, 2011

Feeling broken.

So tonight I'm feeling a bit broken. I had a horrible Saturday morning, feeling sad, angry, trapped and depressed. I've had a hard couple days with the babies screaming a lot, feeling tired, not losing weight and just not getting anything done. It's just worn me down, and when you add that to the fact that I'm feeling pretty bad about myself, and my hubby not doing things exactly as I want him to, and it's lead to me being one SERIOUSLY ticked off mommy/wife.

One cranky little missy.
Everything seems to set me off, all the time. I want to scream, yell, smash things, and sometimes just get away from my family. I hate feeling this way, and am doing what I can to improve my mood. I'm running, trying to sleep more, eat right, and rest when I feel drained but I am still feel cranky despite my little one sleeping more, my toddler napping regularly, and my husband trying to help. I have such a hard time accepting help when he offers and an even harder time asking anyone for help, especially him. I don't know why I can't ask the man I love, who is good enough to be the father of my children, for help, but I just can't.

So our family day together got off to a really bad start but once I ran this afternoon I felt better and my mood improved we had a nice evening. So we're going to spend tomorrow together relaxing as a family. We're also going to go to church with the little ones, and hide in the basement away from the heat. The cooler weather should help my mood a lot too. Wish me luck. I hope I don't scream at anyone tomorrow.

1 comment:

  1. Sorry you're having a rough time Alice. I hope things start to look up soon :)