My back to work date that is. I have been trying to stay positive and enjoy my time at home with my ladies, but it's getting harder and harder for me. I'm down to 18 days until I return to the office. Technically, I'm back on May 28th, but I've got 6 days vacation booked before I go back to the office. Right now when I look at my girls I'm so happy and proud to have such wonderful, happy children, but I can't help but think of all the things I could miss while I'm at work. Katrina's first steps or even first crawls. Lillian managing to use a tricycle successfully. All the hugs, all the kisses, all the smiles. Oh it breaks my heart to think of it.
I know Lillian will be fine since she was in daycare before, but also because she's almost 3 now and talks very well for her age. If something is wrong she will tell me, but Katrina will be in the baby room, and then the toddler room. Lillian will be in the preschool room. The girls won't even be in the same room, and while I understand that, I wish they could be in a room together so Katrina would have Lillian. They will have cameras in the daycare so I can look at them and see what they are up to anytime, but it's not the same.
The other issue is that Katrina still won't take a bottle or sippy cup very well. She'll take a few sips here and there, but mostly she just chews on the nipple and waits for the boob. Steve will be taking them to visit his father during the day tomorrow so this will be the first time that she won't have me available to her the whole day. We'll see if he manages to stay away all day or if he has to rush home to get the baby to stop screaming so much. But her lack of taking a bottle does give me some concern about how they daycare will go, but I guess they are used to kids who don't want to be there, and who won't eat or drink and such.
I know they will be okay, and I know that they will get used to it, and probably be very happy at the daycare, but it doesn't stop the mommy worries from springing up. Right now I'm just trying to enjoy every day I have with them, and think positively about how nice it will be to have regular adult conversations again once I return to work.